English -Tagalog Contemplate - kulang ang mga pinggan
Punctuation - pera para maka-enrol
Ice Buko - nagtatanong kung ayos na ang buhok
Tenacious - sapatos na pang tennis
Calculator - tawagan kita mamaya
Devastation - sakayan ng bus
Protestant - Tindahan ng prutas
Statue - Ikaw ba yan?
Tissue - Ikaw nga!
Predicate - Pakawalan mo ang pusa
Dedicated - Pinatay ang pusa
Aspect - Pantusok o pandurog ng yelo
Deduct - Ang pato
Defeat - Ang paa (ng pato?)
Detail - Ang buntot (ng pato?)
Diploma - ang tubero
Deposit - Gripo (Call DIPLOMA if DEPOSIT is leaking)
Cattle - Doon nakatila ang Hali at Leyna
Persuading - Unang Kasal
Depress - Ang nagkasal sa PERSUADING
Defense - Ginamit ng mga pangsulat sa kontrata sa PERSUADING
It depends - Kainin mo ang bakod
Shampoo - Bago mag-labing-isha (11)
Delusion - Maluwang (kapag maluwang ang damit, eh DELUSION)
Delivery - Walang bayad. Kapag working lunch, eh DELIVERY na ang tanghalian
Profit - Patunayan mo Padala ni Jose Suria
A guy walks in a store and buys a pack of condoms. Pays for it and as he leaves he starts to gigle and shakes his head.
He does this every day at the same time and leaves with sly smile on his face.
The manager of the store was starting to get irritated by his mischievous smile and the shaking of his head.
One day he tells his helper that if the same guy comes in and does the same thing, (buys condom; leave laughing shaking his head) that he follows him and report back to the manager.
Well, the guys comes in and as usual buys the condom and leave smiling. The manager tells the helper to follow him and when the helper came back the manager asked him where did the guy go?
The helper told him,"to your house\"!!!